A video of a couple's engagement in Yunnan, China, has attracted the attention of many people.

According to local custom, in this event, the groom's family must give the bride's family a large dowry.

However, the bride's father thinks differently from the traditional concept of marriage, not taking the dowry as a given.

Therefore, after the ceremonies were performed, he returned the 99,000 yuan (more than 330 million VND) to his son-in-law's family.

The bride's father said: "No need for a dowry, as long as you are happy." This sentence not only shows deep affection and sincere blessings, but also challenges traditional concepts about marriage and the pursuit of love.

The groom's father-in-law's actions moved him to tears. The video shows him covering his face to hide and wipe away his tears of gratitude.

For him, the return of the dowry is not only a matter of money but also shows the bride's family's blessing for him and his fiancee.

The groom confided: "We are very grateful for their (the wife's parents') understanding and support. This is not only a respect for us but also an expectation for our future happy life together."

The video has attracted the attention of many netizens, because dowry is still a controversial issue in Chinese society today. Many comments express the desire of today's youth to pursue love and happiness.

- "The view that marriage is not about material things but only about happiness is admirable"

- "They saw the true meaning of love and marriage"; "Hope they will be happy"

- "If all parents were like this father-in-law, many sad stories and tragicomedies related to weddings would not have happened"...

Tensions over dowry in China

A man in Fujian has called on the government to intervene to curb the "skyrocketing" dowry problem that is narrowing the opportunities for Chinese men to get married.

"It's not something a salaried worker can afford. I hope the leaders can help solve the problem," said a resident of Putian, who sent a petition to the party secretary of Fujian province (southeast China), posted on an online bulletin board of the province.

This person claimed that the average cost of a wedding dowry in Putian in 2023 is 780,000 yuan (2.7 billion VND), in richer places like Zhongmen and Dongzhuang towns it can range from 800,000 to 2 million yuan (2.8 billion to 7 billion VND).

The Putian resident’s letter has sparked heated debate on social media, with many criticizing the huge sums spent on bride prices, saying the families are “selling their daughters” and “showing off their wealth.”

Others argue that tradition dictates that most parents should give gifts to the new couple. "In Putian, if there is a betrothal gift worth one million yuan, in most cases the bride's parents will give a dowry of the same amount.

"All the assets belong to the newlyweds," another user on social media Weibo argued. Others said the situation was similar in Jiangxi province.

The increase in dowry costs is strongest in big cities like Beijing, Shanghai, or southern provinces like Fujian.

In some cases, families compete to see who can spend the most money on the wedding or have a more lavish ceremony, leaving many couples deep in debt after tying the knot.

In Chinese tradition, a dowry is a part of the wedding ceremony, consisting of cash and other gifts such as gold and jewelry given to the bride's family. Brides are required to wear gold when they get married, even wearing all the gold they own on their bodies.

One of the purposes is to demonstrate that the mother's family is very powerful and that they will not be bullied when marrying into the groom's family.

China's gender imbalance (104 men to 100 women by 2022) also contributes to the skyrocketing cost of wedding gifts.